Tuesday, June 28, 2011

In God's Time

I spend A LOT of time praying for patience.  In return, God spends A LOT of time laughing at me.  It has taken years of talking to the Big Guys Upstairs for me to realize that The Almighty doesn’t just bestow patience on any Joe Shmoe that sends up a request for the noble trait.  Nope, He usually just throws me a 90-mile-an-hour curve ball then leaves it up me to swing and miss or knock it out of the park. 
James requires A LOT of patience.  So, as you can imagine, I’ve been thrown A LOT of curve balls in the past 10 months.  First came waiting for the day we could finally bring James home.  Next, convincing James he could fall asleep in his crib on his own.  Then, weeks of wishing that first little baby tooth would FINALLY break through so that we could back off the Tylenol long enough for James’ liver to recover.  It seemed that one dilemma was shortly followed by another and another and—well, you get it.  And each dilemma would bring me to my knees asking for that one rediculous yet essential blessing.  Our life had turned into one big curve ball.  But nothing holds a candle to the battle that lay ahead:  JAMES VS. CRAWLING.  (Cue the DUM DUM DUM music). 
It began with James lying on his belly arms flailing and legs kicking in mid-air—imagine a turtle on his back trying to flip over.  James hated “tummy time” but it was a necessary evil and knowing that this would be the only way he would ever start to crawl I forced him to endure at least one session a day.  After months of agony, family members rushed to our side, certain they knew the secret to teach James to crawl.  Reports of crawling and scooting from other moms with babies  months younger than James started coming in.  Needless to say I was frustrated—frustrated that James might be “lacking” in an area of his development, frustrated I couldn’t leave the room without picking up a 24 pound sack of aggravation and carrying him with me, but most of all frustrated that I couldn’t just fix it.   He wanted to crawl so badly but just couldn’t quite get it and so he would cry and there was nothing I could do but encourage him to try again.  This went on for months but it seemed like years.  Finally, last month James achieved victory!  Since then he has rocketed through the house, grabbing onto anything and everything, climbing up stairs, pulling up, letting go and standing triumphantly on his own.  No steps yet, but that’s okay because I know they’ll come…eventually. 
I am not a patient person.  I constantly have to work on chilling out and letting things happen in their own time and in their own way.  It’s not easy when it comes to my kid.  I want so much for James---I want him to always feel happy and loved.  I hate to see him get so frustrated when he can’t quite figure out how to do something.  It’s so hard to hold back that mommy to the rescue instinct and let him solve problems in his own time and his own way.  But when he finally works it out all by himself the look on his face is priceless.  Here are just a few things that James has discovered since set out on his own!










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