FoyTales: Quality, Not Quantity

Oh, right – the blog…

There’s been a lot of give and take in the Foy house over the last couple of months. Trading in toys on shelves for toys strategically scattered on the floor so that I trip over at least two on my way out the door (and then sometimes fall onto the dog who I believe has also strategically placed himself in my path as well). Trading matching clothes for simply clean clothes…well thought out meals for hodge-podge dinners…and Foy Tale posts for spending those few precious hours after daycare pick-ups but before bedtime glued to James with the intention of tricking his mind into thinking we’re together for more of the day than we actually are and hoping that he doesn’t notice when I crawl into the fort we made and close one eye – okay, sometimes both eyes.

You take what you’re given, you work your ass off during the day with the hope of being able to leave it all behind, shut it off, or at least tuck it away for later so that you can come home and focus on nothing else but your family – come home and just be “Mama”. And while some days are easier than others, you find a way to make it work, to stretch yourself being careful not to overstretch yourself. Trading in “that’s not the way I do it” (or “ the way it’s supposed to be done”) for “thanks for the help.” Giving up a little of your pride when you just can’t rally for “Super-Mom Saturday” after a 60 hour work week. (Super-Mom Saturday is defined as a Saturday where I get up have breakfast with James, clean the entire house – yep, potties and all, make a snack for James, do most of the laundry, feed James lunch and put him down for a nap all before Eddie gets home from the golf course…and to be honest it’s only been done a handful of times.)

There were days over the last several weeks when I could just coast right on through and the days when the bus left track marks on my face. Either way, there were things on my to-do list that didn’t get done. And the last few months have taught me that that’s okay. At the end of the day, I know that I gave it my all, and more importantly that I gave them my all. I was attentive to patients, I made my kid laugh, I called a friend on the way home, I dried my hair with my hairdryer on the “low” setting so that I wouldn’t wake Eddie up at 4:30 in the morning, I turned on a light so I wouldn’t fall over Max again. I’m not going to lie and tell you that I didn’t doze off at one point during a riveting game of hide-and-seek with James and Eddie (and Max sometimes) or pretend like I didn’t have to wait an extra 30 minutes at the Kangaroo on Gorman Street for Eddie’s brother, Charlie, to graciously drive across Raleigh and fill my car up with gas because I left my wallet at home – 25 miles away – 2 days in a row. And until I succeed in squeezing 36 hours into one day I’m definitely okay with that – even though it could get expensive seeing as how I also owe my friend, Mary-Beth, 2 lunches and a few Diet Mountain Dews after she bailed me out at lunch and helped to prevent me from experiencing symptoms of caffeine withdrawal on my wallet-less days.

There have been plenty of conversations with James I’ve wanted to share, moments in the afternoon that begged me to run and write about them, weekends that needed reflection, and thoughts and feelings that deserved to be strung together with the perfect words so that I can look back and remember the little things that make our little bit of time together so much more than little. But the Foy Family has been a little busy and in our family, life trumps writing about life. In our family, quality for quantity looks a bit like this:

Playing with Tractors: